Time After Time
by Kaylee Possible
Summary: Post Season 4. Bellamy is on the Ark. He thinks Clarke is dead. He's trying to lock his feelings away, but he can't help but wonder what they mean. Could he be in love with Clarke? And could she have possibly love him back? Story starts with Bellamy's time in the Ark but will eventually end with Bellarke on Earth.
1. She Died Saving You

_A/N Bellarke is separated in the beginning chapters obviously He thinks she is dead. There will be some "romantic" like moments between him and Echo/Raven. I'm not sure how their relationship will pan out but **Bellarke is end game**. Also apologies for any mistakes, I'm incredibly busy at Uni right now, but I just couldn't get these two out of my head. Enjoy and please review and tell me what you think._

It started with one drink and turned into two. Then it grew from there until he had consumed the entire bottle of liquor. Somehow he had ended up naked, laying on a cool metal floor beside an also naked and equally drunk Echo.

He felt his stomach twist, from the alcohol and from his bedfellow. He didn't hate Echo, but there still was a sense of mistrust there. Echo put herself first, always, that was something Bellamy just couldn't understand. He wasn't like that, he always put Octavia first, his people first. He did what had to he done to protect those he loved just like...

He stops his train of thought there, his head pounding like a hammer trying to break out from inside his head. He couldn't let himself think about her anymore. It had been 72 days, but it still hurt to much. He could only think about the now. His focus was on the Ark and it only. He's the leader, they need him. They were just getting used to life on the Ark, it was only last week they got the Algae farm completely sustainable.

Slowly, Bellamy sits up, lifting the boxer shorts off the floor and pulling them up to his waist. The chill from the air vent sends a shiver down his spine. Echo lays motionless on the floor beside him, her back facing him. Glancing around he realizes that he isn't in a room he recognizes, it must be a maintenance room. There are cleaning supplies lining the walls. He felt like he needed cleaning after this.

Bellamy felt the nausea wash over him as he glanced over at the girl unconscious beside him. Maybe she would be drunk enough not to remember anything about their encounter when she woke, he was drunk enough to only remember bits.

It started out with them glazing out at earth, the red clouds and fiery mess of it making them both depressed.

Raven and the others had adjusted to life back on the earth quickly enough. They had lived here before, life returned to a sense of normalcy. They had new responsibilities now but besides taking care of the algae farm and keeping the Ark in running conditions, their life was run by the motto of whatever the hell they want.

Emori and Echo seemed to be the only two having issues adjusting. Emori stayed with Murphy most of the time, the two only separating when they went off to their jobs. Emori helped Raven with repairs on the tech of the Ark.

Echo couldn't seem to find her place. An Ice Nation spy amongst Sky people. She felt like a literal fish out of water. She had tried to kill all of them before, and now here she is, living with them.

Bellamy found the liquor in a cabinet in the Earth monitoring center. There was a whole basket of it. The liquid burnt his throat as it went down as he looked out the window. It was hard to believe his sister was on that earth, that Clarke had sacrificed her life to ensure he and the others didn't suffer a melting fate. He owed her everything, yet he never truly believed she would be gone. They were supposed to make it, together, like they always did everything. Together.

Somehow his depressed thoughts turned into sex with Echo. He really needed to stop drinking.

As Bellamy stands from the cool floor where he laid and goes to collect the rest of his clothes, Echo turned to face him.

"We can pretend it never happened. I do have a reputation to protect after all." Her voice breaks through the silence of the dark.

Bellamy says nothing, he's not sure what to say.

"You miss her don't you." Echo questions.

"Octavia? You know I do." Bellamy whispers back as he slips on the rest of his clothes.

"That's not the her I was referring to and you know it." Echo says cooly.

Bellamy was hoping to not speak of this with her. Clarke was none of her business.

"Clarke and I weren't like that."

Echo's eyebrows raise from her shock.

"You guys didn't even once?"

He shoots her a look over his shoulder.

"Well that is a surprise. You two, seemed inseparable."

He doesn't respond, that vault needs to stay shut. He can't focus on the past, he's got to keep moving on. Fully dressed, he heads towards the door.

"I'm sorry, you know. I never said it. Clarke was special, and that's coming from me. I didn't get it before that last day, I thought she was overrated." Echo stands from the floor, her body completely revealed to him. Bellamy doesn't even look. "Roan spoke of her like she was some mystical being, the great Wanheda. He had more respect for her than he ever did for me and I did everything he ever asked. Lexa thought she hung the moon. And then there's you. The strong soldier who doesn't take crap from anyone. Besides your sister, she's the only one you ever let in. The one you would give your life for and she for you. Time after time, you two were it for each other."

Bellamy felt the vault begin to open, the emotions trickling out and stinging his heart just as bad as the alcohol did last night.

"What's your point Echo?" Bellamy asks sternly, his hand on the door. He couldn't stand this much longer.

"My point is, even now you can't admit the truth, you can't just say that you loved the girl and it made you weak. It still does. Take last night for example."

"Last night wasn't about her."

"Sure it was. You know Octavia is safe. She's got her little Trikru posse. She's the Heda of them all. The only other person who can cause you can get that drunk is Clarke. She's the only other one you care that much about."

"Fine, I cared about her okay. Maybe even loved her. She was there for me like you said, time after time. Even when we made mistakes, even when we didn't agree, we always had each others backs. Always. Sure it could have been more, easily. But who the hell knows what could have happened because we were running from our lives too much to ever stop and think about it. We never had down time. We were always putting our people first, trying to protect them from people like you." His voice is laced with venom.

"Hey." Echo begins, but Bellamy continues.

"No. I'm done talking about this. I'm done." His voice cracks. "It's over, she's gone. She died, doing what she always does. Saving everyone but herself." His pulls the door open harshly.

"She died saving you." He heard Echo whisper as he walked briskly out the door. It stopped him in his tracks. It's true. He knew it, everyone knew it. The single person she cared about more than anyone else on that ship was Bellamy.


	2. Clarke Would Want You To

**Sorry it's a short chapter, I have a 10 page lab report to write so I was on a bit of a time crunch. Uni has been brutal so apologies if there are any mistakes. Also, I made some slight changes to the first chapter. I decided to go in a slightly different direction, so just a few details had to be changed.**

 **Please review and let me know what you thought and what your predictions are in terms of where Bellamy and the Skaicru will be next season!**

 **Check me out on tumblr kayleelovestowrite**

 **Also a special thanks to ashmo2000 for their review!**

* * *

 **Day 75 – Chapter Two – Clarke Would Want You To**

For the most part Bellamy has been able to avoid Echo since their drunken hookup turned confrontation in the maintenance closet. With all the essentials of Ark life set up, Monty has switched his focus to getting all the Ark's technical systems under his control and has been keeping Echo busy. Tech isn't her thing, but the others all had jobs, and if Echo is good at anything, it's taking orders from someone in charge. She's done it all her life.

Monty's first conquest was the Earth Monitoring system. It didn't take but a flick of a switch to bring all the monitors back, full with all the delinquent faces. The room was big enough for them to sleep in, since most of the other rooms are blocked off from damage caused by the Ark departing from the ring.

* * *

 _It was an overwhelming site. Seeing all those they had lost. Jasper, Finn, Monroe, Roma. Every loss from the beginning floods back, each memory twinging in Bellamy's stomach, but two faces in particular, make his stomach sink. Octavia…and Clarke. Octavia wasn't dead, but it had been days since he last laid eyes on her, and they had just gotten back in a good place. Most of their time on earth had been consumed with Bellamy trying to protect Octavia, and Octavia hating him for it._

 _In his heart, Bellamy has to hold onto the hope that Octavia is going to stay alive in that bunker until he can reach her again. She would be okay. She had her protector Indra. She had Kane and Abby._

 _Abby. The thought of her reminds him he is supposed to be sharing – and easing – this separation pain with Clarke. She left her mother in that bunker, and he left his sister. They were supposed to ride the next five years together. With her, life without Octavia would have been bearable. Now it just feels empty._

 _Sex with Echo didn't solve anything. Alcohol didn't solve anything. Knowing that he kept his promise to himself, and kept them alive so she didn't die in vain hasn't helped either. She was still dead, and nothing was ever going to change that._

 _Leading with Raven isn't the same. She's smart, way smarter than he will ever be, but she isn't Clarke. She doesn't understand him the way that Clarke does. He can't talk to her about Octavia the way he used to with Clarke._

 _Bellamy's eyes gravitate to Clarke's face up on the Earth monitoring screen. Her face looking displeased, similar to how she looked at him when they first landed in the dropship. He felt something rise in his throat at the thought of her. No, he wasn't doing this. With a shrug, he turns and heads back to the algae farm. Not allowing him to look back at all he has lost._

* * *

Everyone but Bellamy sleeps in the Earth monitoring room, Bellamy sleeps in the hall. He claims it has something to do with the view. He can see earth from his spot in front of the port window. The truth is, he can't bear to look at the screen anymore, all the faces haunt him. All those he failed to save.

He tried to convince Raven to turn it off, but Monty wanted to leave them on. Something about seeing Jasper soothed him, and Raven felt the same way about Finn. Part of Bellamy was relieved. Part of him wanted Clarke and Octavia's faces to stay in sight for the rest of his life.

"Harper and Echo found seven living quarters when they cleaned out that hallway this morning." Raven tells Bellamy as they eat together in the mess hall.

Everyone else is still working, they take their lunch breaks in shifts, making sure someone is always monitoring the fragile life sustaining systems. Raven and Bellamy usually took their lunch break together.

"How many?"

"Seven exactly. One for each of us. It worked out perfect. They belonged to the seven council members. Jaha's is the biggest. I suppose we should let one of the couples have it."

"We'll give it to Monty and Harper." Bellamy decides immediately.

"We can give Murphy and Emori, Kane's room. It is close to the same size, Kane even had some renovations made, so it sounds like a good compromise. That leaves the other 5 for the rest of us to choose from. The one across from Kane's looks pretty big. It was the Griffin's…" Raven's voice drops off. The name had escaped her lips before she thought about it. Her heart clinches as she sees Bellamy's face notably drop. His jaw clenching tightly without him even realizing it.

Since that talk at the window, right after getting on the Ark, Raven had tried to limit talk of Clarke to a minimum. Every decision they made had her in it, both Bellamy and Raven knew it by just looking at each other. Clarke was very present, but her name was just too painful for either of them to say and Raven wasn't quite sure how much longer Bellamy could hold his pain in before he has a breakdown.

"You should have it Bellamy." Raven insists. "The other four are roughly the same size, just slightly smaller but nothing to complain about after sleeping in Earth station for two months. Echo and I can have our picks"

"I don't need the bigger room Raven. Give it to Echo or take it yourself." Bellamy says coarsely.

"You're taking it Bellamy…Clarke would want you to." Raven persists, her dark eyes piercing his.

Taking a breath, Bellamy relents. It might be interesting to see where Clarke grew up, and since it's the Princess' room, it would most definitely have a view.

Getting the directions to the apartment from Raven, Bellamy turns to leave.

"And Bellamy, you can't avoid Echo forever. She may be Ice Nation, but I think she can still get her feelings hurt when the guy she slept with avoids her." Raven's voice is soft, unjudging, not anything like Bellamy expected it to be.

"I heard you both talking the other night, in the closet, when I was on my way back to the Earth monitoring station."

Bellamy opens his mouth to say something.

"I'm not going to tell anyone Bellamy. She's still having trouble fitting in and I think the others finding out you slept together would just make things worse."

Bellamy nods his head in agreement.

Raven opens her mouth, like she is about to say something else, but she closes it again before words come out.

"Hey, Raven." Bellamy says standing up from the table. "Thanks. For helping me keep my promise, to her."

"Always."

* * *

 **Author's Note:**  
 **So Bellamy is staying in the Griffin's apartment! This should be interesting. If she drew in her cell, she must have drawn in her bedroom as well!**

 **Thanks for reading & please review let me know what you think! What would you like to see in a later chapter? **


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